Curling of the lips.

I love to smile.  Sometimes I smile so much that my face hurts.  Typically when that happens I laugh so hard and smile even bigger.  There is just something about a smile that I love.  Maybe it is how the lips curl upwards or maybe it is the way a smile changes the whole face.  You get dimples and your eyes squish together.  It is beautiful.  A smile speaks volumes about a person.  You can smile without showing teeth or you can smile with.  Either way it's breathtaking.  The best thing about a smile though is the way it infects others.  I do not care what people say, smiles are contagious.  People always ask me why I am so happy.  It's simple.  Just because I'm having a bad day doesn't mean I have to bring others down as well.  I will always smile and laugh.  It's contagious and I love infecting others with the happy bug.

My dad and I love to smile :)

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

So a couple days ago I was on Instagram and this woman posted a photo of herself in the doctors office with the caption "getting ready for the test".  She explained how she was getting her skin tested because there were abnormal cells.  She said how she thought that she should be this beautiful woman who was tan, tall and skinny.  She would starve herself so her thighs didn't touch and would tan to an extreme.  Now she is facing the possibility of skin cancer.  Do I know this woman?  No.  I follow her because she makes custom Toms shoes and I love them.  She has posted a few photos of herself and she is very pretty.  To see this woman open up to random strangers and say how she tried to be societies idea of "perfection" and how it might end up killing her was heartbreaking.  Today little girls are growing up with the idea that anything bigger than a size 2 is fat, white skin is frowned upon, being tall is ideal and having luscious blonde hair is sought after.  I will admit when I was younger I wanted blonde hair, tan skin, and a tiny waist.  I would watch what I ate and dye my hair.  Then something struck me.  Why did I care what others thought of me?  I loved food and I wanted to eat it.  Hell, I ate the food my friends didn't eat.  Yes, I did gain a little more weight.  But who cares?  I have curves, I have brunette hair, I have pale skin, and guess what, there is someone out there who likes me for myself.  He is great and tells me how much he likes me the way I am.  Sure, there are men out there who prefer the skinny, tall, tan woman.  There are also men out there that prefer the 5'5, pale, curly haired red head.  There is a man or woman (depending on who you prefer) out there for you.  Trust me, I know.  Never change yourself to please others.  Make yourself happy and someone will come and find you.  And if you aren't searching for someone than so be it.  Do not alter your appearances because society tells you to.  Do what you want and screw everyone and everything else.  

Words of a poet.

I am an avid reader.  Whether it be my juvenile delinquency and justice text book or a my favorite sonnet by William Shakespeare, I love to read.  Every time I go to my Nana's house I "borrow" more books from her.  I use quotes because she thinks I steal them while I think I borrow them.  I mean, hey, I return them.  Sure it takes me about a year but at least I give them back.  That's got to count for something right?  Well any who, the point is that I read.  My favorite thing to read is romance with poetry a close second.  I could read sonnets, haikus, etc. forever.  I thought I would share some poems with you.

All poems were found on Pinterest.

I'm back :)

Yeah, yeah. I know it's been a while since I've last written a post, but hey, I'm a busy person.  So much has happened to me since my last post way back in April.  Then again it has been 6 months.  Some things were bound to happen within that time.  So here, let me give you the low down.

May: Finished up a semester of school and started talking to this guy.  
June: Went to Vegas with said guy.  
July: Moved to Arizona with my Aunt for a month and started dating said guy.
August: Moved into my first apartment and started my junior year of college.
September: Started tutoring inmates at the local jail for their GED.
October: Saw my boyfriend for the first time in 3 months and MY SISTER GOT MARRIED!!!

Oh and did I mention I was the Maid of Honor?!?  For those of you who have yet to experience the Maid of Honor title, let me fill you in on a few things.  First, prepare to eat, sleep, breathe wedding.  You're going to start to wonder if you're actually the one getting married.  You will hear colors that you never knew existed, such as peek-a-boo pink and mellow yellow.  I'm still not sure what those colors even look like.  Second, be prepared to eat a lot.  Seriously though, you will consume ungodly amounts of food.  The worst part is that you cannot say no.  You must do it "for the sake of the wedding".  Yeah try telling my favorite pair of jeans that.  Third, you must make sure your phone is with you at all times.  It is an unspoken law.  If you leave your phone alone for five minutes you WILL receive 30 text messages, 12 picture messages, 8 missed phone calls, and 6 voice mails.  I'm not kidding.  We both know how annoying that little voice mail icons are at the top of the phone.  Fourth, you cannot eat.  I know, I know, I just said you will eat ungodly amounts of food.  Yeah it sucks.  You have to eat but not eat at the same time.  There is this thing called a bridesmaids dress and if you don't fit into it, bridezilla will unleash scary things onto you.  Speaking of bridezilla, AVOID HER AT ALL COSTS.  The groom will say it is your responsibility to control her.  Wrong.  So, so wrong.  It is his job.  If he wants to marry her then he can deal with that.

But when the day comes, you forget everything that has led up to the day and you just accept that what's done is done and what's not been accomplished will not happen.  As long as the bride and groom are happy, you have done your job.

But yeah, that is why I have been busy and unable to write.  But have no fear, I will be blogging constantly.  Maybe not everyday, maybe more than once in a day.  Who knows, because I sure don't.

Photo courtesy of Jane Hasty.

Check out her website here:

http://www.janehastyphotography.com/

Oh hey there.

I never forgot about writing this blog. I simply just have not had time. Between college, work, working out, and trying to breathe I just have not had a minute to relax. Most of my creativity time has gone towards poems. I am sorta in this in-between state right now. Neither happy nor sad. Simply just living. Going about my days with no plan or action except to stay alive and do what I need to. I have had a lot happen to me in these past few months that I am not even sure what this life is anymore. But then again I am only 19, verging on 20. I have all this time left to figure out what life is. So today I breathe, smile, and go about my day. I will figure out what I am supposed to do with this life I was given. Today isn't that day. Tomorrow? Probably not. Maybe next month, year, decade. Until then, well I don't exactly know. Follow me and find out. 

Zumba

So this weekend I started my six week plan to get fit.  I joined a Zumba class.  We meet twice a week for six weeks.  Each class is fifty long grueling minutes.  After that I ride a bicycle for thirty minutes and then abs for twenty.  Sometimes I go to the gym other days as well with a friend.  I swear I have never sweat so much.  It's disgusting.  But I do not care.  My body hurts like nothing I have ever felt.  But it is a good kind of hurt.  The kind where you know you did something great to get it.  I go to bed exhausted but wake up feeling better then ever.  And it is not just exercising that I am doing.  I am also eating healthy.  I mean I am sad to have to give up my favorite sandwich ever, the Pepperoni Melt, but a chicken salad is pretty good.  Yeah I have to put time into this, but in all honesty I really wouldn't be doing much else.  Maybe watching tv and stuffing my face.  So instead I am working my gluteus maximus off.  Granted I have motivation to do it.  I have a wedding in eight months.  I have to stand up in front of everyone and I will make damn sure that I look good.  I am the maid of honor.  I will not look anything other than amazing.  That is my first priority.  Granted my grandma thinks I should be more worried about finding a date.  Um yeah no.  I'd rather look hot.  I'll craigslist a date a week before the wedding and pray he's not completely creepy.  But for now I shall sweat out all my worries and stress and maybe, just maybe eat one Pepperoni Melt for old times sake.

Randomness.

It's Friday and I wanted to post something but couldn't figure out what to write. So here are pictures to describe me.  So yeah, my life.  

I did it to my college professor last semester. I hate my life.

How I feel about my books for college.

AND FINALLY...

My motivation.

Set your alarm for 6 a.m.  Don't groan when it goes off and pull the covers over your head, get up and start your day.  Put on a baggy top and running shorts.  Go pour yourself a nice big glass of ice water.  Cut up some fruit and mix it with yogurt.  Add some granola.  Now go outside.  Stretch for 10 minutes.  Skip for 5 minutes.  Jog for 10 minutes.  Run for 10 minutes.  Walk back to the beginning.  Lay on the ground.  Proceed to do 50 crunches.  Yes it will hurt when you are done but it will be worth it.  Now climb in the shower.  Use some nice smelling shampoo and matching conditioner.  Shave your legs and wash your body.  Exfoliate your face.  Get out of the shower and let your hair dry.  Look in the mirror.  Do you like what you see?  If you do, good for you.  Do this every day and you will continue to love yourself.  If you don't, do this every day and pretty soon you will.  Being lazy might feel good at the time, but being active feels better in the long run.  How badly do you want it?

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

This is my motivation.  Between going to the Dells over spring break (hello bathing suit), summer (bikini season), and my sister's upcoming nuptials (standing in front of everyone is a short dress), I have never been more motivated in my life to get into shape.  I don't want to get scary skinny, just fit.  A little toned in my arms, a little tinier in my waist, and a little thinner in my thighs.  I figured if I can motivate myself to keep this up by hitting each goal (spring break-March, summer-June, and the wedding-October) then not only will I be rewarding myself with a kick ass body but maybe, just maybe, I will treat myself to a new pair of shoes.  So if I can do this, me, a candy loving, T.V. watching, carb-o-holic, then why can't anyone else do it too.  Sure my personal words can only hit you so deep but take what I wrote on top and print it out.  Put it over your bed.  Stick it on you mirror in the bathroom.  Hang it on the door of your closet.  Cause maybe if you read it enough it will cause you to want to do it.  Do it once a week, then work to twice a week, and then eventually you will be doing it every day.  I have faith in you just like I have faith in me!

Mildly freaking out.

For most people this was just another weekend.  For me this as anything but.  Late last night I received a phone call from my sister.  She informed me that her boyfriend, Chris, asked her a very important question.  Of course I immediately asked what the question was.  It was then that she half said/half screamed that he popped the question.  Of course I screamed and ran around in circles.  I am not proud of it but it happened. As soon as I stopped freaking out she proceeded to ask me a question: would I be her Maid of Honor.  Of course I said yes and this brought on another round of screaming and running in circles.  When I finally calmed down, again, she gave me full details and told me everything that she had planned.  Tonight I talked with her for an hour and a half about wedding details.  I have only known for 24 hours.  I can tell that this will be the first of many long, detail oriented, stressful calls.  The thing is though that I cannot wait for the next call.  I cannot wait to come home periodically to help her and Skype her when I can't.  This is a big task for me to take on and I would not do it for anyone but my sister.  I am so happy for her and her new fiance Chris.  She deserves so much happiness and she found it with him.  They are the cutest and most adorable couple that I have ever met.  They give me hope that love exists and someday I could be like her.  So for now I want to celebrate her new engagement and soak up all the awesomeness before things start to get hectic.  So this is for Chris and Sarah.  May their love grow stronger each and every day and may they live long and prosper.  

My sister and my niece. So happy for the 

both of them as well as Chris (not picture).

I'm back!

After a month of being awol I am finally back.  Between studying for finals, the holidays, and a lot of personal issues, I did not have time for casual writing   I missed it greatly but there was no time for it.  At points I wanted to write but I  couldn't.  I just couldn't.  One thing I will say is that writing again is nice.  I am no Shakespeare but I do believe I can write a decent blog.  Well a decent blog every here and there.  I want to thank everyone who has ever read one of my posts and to those who are reading it tonight.  With my return I promise to give you a huge variety of topics to read.  Some may be random but it's my blog so just deal with it...pretty please! Now I shall leave you, for I am extremely tired and need to sleep.  So hello to the old readers and welcome to the new!  Be patient my little ones for this new year will bring a new me and certainly a bunch of new posts.